River's on the Moon

lady-wylfsbane:

themorbidmaiden:

whenever i see tripp pants i remember when i was in my senior year of high school. there was this sophmore girl who would sit the table me and some of my friends sat at during lunch period. she dated a guy who graduated before us but we knew him because he wore these pants almost every day.
one day she came to the table very upset, and when we asked her what was wrong, she said she broke up with her boyfriend because he lied all the time. he had been telling lies throughout their entire relationship. you wanna know what the lies were? he lied to her saying he was adopted, and he was a half-vampire demigod. she was crying
she was crying because her boyfriend lied to her about being an adopted half-vampire demigod
she believed

When I was in high school the guy I’m dating and living with now was a few years older than my friends and I and he had was a goth kid too but he’s very intelligent and charismatic and loved to mess with the crazy goth kids so he has them all believing he was a 3000 year old vampire lord who knew Jesus and he had a bet with him and now Jesus owes him 2 goats which is now like $500 and Jesus started Christianity and died to get out of the deal so he was waiting for the second coming to get his money from Jesus which is only going to increase with inflation and interest and all these 14-15 year olds actually believed him and that he had the powers and shit so he used it to start a ‘cult following’ and these kids would bring him food and buy him gifts and even when he told them to stop they wouldn’t leave him alone and it’s amazing what high school kids believe

lady-wylfsbane:

themorbidmaiden:

whenever i see tripp pants i remember when i was in my senior year of high school. there was this sophmore girl who would sit the table me and some of my friends sat at during lunch period. she dated a guy who graduated before us but we knew him because he wore these pants almost every day.

one day she came to the table very upset, and when we asked her what was wrong, she said she broke up with her boyfriend because he lied all the time. he had been telling lies throughout their entire relationship. you wanna know what the lies were? he lied to her saying he was adopted, and he was a half-vampire demigod. she was crying

she was crying because her boyfriend lied to her about being an adopted half-vampire demigod

she believed

When I was in high school the guy I’m dating and living with now was a few years older than my friends and I and he had was a goth kid too but he’s very intelligent and charismatic and loved to mess with the crazy goth kids so he has them all believing he was a 3000 year old vampire lord who knew Jesus and he had a bet with him and now Jesus owes him 2 goats which is now like $500 and Jesus started Christianity and died to get out of the deal so he was waiting for the second coming to get his money from Jesus which is only going to increase with inflation and interest and all these 14-15 year olds actually believed him and that he had the powers and shit so he used it to start a ‘cult following’ and these kids would bring him food and buy him gifts and even when he told them to stop they wouldn’t leave him alone and it’s amazing what high school kids believe

(via the-sociopaths-have-the-bluebox)

annicron:

look at this thing i got at the airport when leaving germany
it’s a giant tic tac box filled with tiny tic tac boxes

annicron:

look at this thing i got at the airport when leaving germany

it’s a giant tic tac box filled with tiny tic tac boxes

(via stark-spangled-trickster)

all-four-cheekbones:

facts-i-just-made-up:

Genetically Modified Berry compared to Organic Berry:
Note that the modified specimen is bloated to about 3 times the mass of the common berry. Advanced rot has set in prior to maturity and tests revealed 78% more lactic acid in the modified organism.
Upon contact with the modified berry, the picker’s hands exhibited a rash which is clearly visible on the fingers and should not be mistaken for juice stains acquired during picking. While the common berry, of course, has no ill effects on the skin, the modified organism had an effect similar to poison oak and swelling set in shortly after the photo was taken.  The discoloration and pain lasted approximately 12 hours with treatment including Neosporin and Syrup of Ipecac.
At 16 hours the specimen went missing and could not be monitored for decay rates.  While the common berry remained, the modified berry was spotted the next Tuesday at the corner of Wallace and 12th St. Having grown another meter and a half, the genetically modified berry murdered two prostitutes and became the target of a cross country manhunt. It was last seen on February 20th in Boulder, CO where it has joined with several bananas from the Monsanto corporation and stolen at least two shotguns from the Boulder Police Department.
A manifesto was released online suggesting that the berries intend to strike at our nurseries, killing our young and replacing them with further modified organisms which we will raise as our own. They also intend to “free their enslaved brothers” by treating common fruits and possibly vegetables with mutagens.
The head of the FDA could not be reached for comment as he has gone missing. Only a glass of unidentified red fluid was found in his office, labeled “Extra Pulp”.

#I am so glad I kept reading

all-four-cheekbones:

facts-i-just-made-up:

Genetically Modified Berry compared to Organic Berry:

Note that the modified specimen is bloated to about 3 times the mass of the common berry. Advanced rot has set in prior to maturity and tests revealed 78% more lactic acid in the modified organism.

Upon contact with the modified berry, the picker’s hands exhibited a rash which is clearly visible on the fingers and should not be mistaken for juice stains acquired during picking. While the common berry, of course, has no ill effects on the skin, the modified organism had an effect similar to poison oak and swelling set in shortly after the photo was taken.  The discoloration and pain lasted approximately 12 hours with treatment including Neosporin and Syrup of Ipecac.

At 16 hours the specimen went missing and could not be monitored for decay rates.  While the common berry remained, the modified berry was spotted the next Tuesday at the corner of Wallace and 12th St. Having grown another meter and a half, the genetically modified berry murdered two prostitutes and became the target of a cross country manhunt. It was last seen on February 20th in Boulder, CO where it has joined with several bananas from the Monsanto corporation and stolen at least two shotguns from the Boulder Police Department.

A manifesto was released online suggesting that the berries intend to strike at our nurseries, killing our young and replacing them with further modified organisms which we will raise as our own. They also intend to “free their enslaved brothers” by treating common fruits and possibly vegetables with mutagens.

The head of the FDA could not be reached for comment as he has gone missing. Only a glass of unidentified red fluid was found in his office, labeled “Extra Pulp”.

#I am so glad I kept reading

(via timelordonbakerstreet)

rosalarian:

littlefroggies:

bisexual-community:

Common Myths About Bisexuality from the lovely personal memoir in a web comic format Jesus Loves Lesbians, Too by bi blogger & author Maria Burnham (writer/memoirist) and Maggie Siegel-Berele (comic artist).

Remember Bisexuals are just people who can ♥ people of SAME/SIMILAR Gender as themselves + can ♥ people of DIFFERENT Genders/Gender Presentations from themselves.

All the rest of it about must be Exactly 50%/50%; can’t be/can’t ♥ trans/genderqueer people; the 3 C’s: Confused; Closeted + sex-Crazed; must always be poly + can’t be monogamous; yadda, yadda, yada, are just hooey + nonsense made up by haters and fools.

I usually don’t reblog stuff like this because this is my art blog but this hit close to home and reminded me of so many conversations that made me feel like garbage.

It always makes me see red when I see lesbians (and gay men) treating bisexuals this way. I don’t think I can even type too much more without quickly reaching a point where I just smash my head into the keyboard.

(via stark-spangled-trickster)

wreckitrach:

"you shouldn’t be depressed, people have it worse than you"

finally, after years of searching, the person with the worst life ever is found. formally, they are granted permission to be sad. but only them. only they have earned it. no sads for anyone else at all ever

(Source: theawolbrony, via timelordonbakerstreet)

homoaquatus:

but if bisexuality doesn’t exist, why is it that i, dean winchester

(via acklesdowney)

fuzzy-potato:

waltsherlockwho:


lizziemcganja:

WHO THE FUCK IS RESPONSIBLE FOR THIS?

Make John Green find the thing?


This is the kind of movie Gus would have wanted to be in.

fuzzy-potato:

waltsherlockwho:

lizziemcganja:

WHO THE FUCK IS RESPONSIBLE FOR THIS?

Make John Green find the thing?

This is the kind of movie Gus would have wanted to be in.

(Source: thisisuscrazymofos, via sociopathinhellwiththetardis)

slutdust:

I bought my friend an elephant for their room.

They said “Thank you.”

I said “Don’t mention it.”

(via cthulhu-with-a-fez)

New favourite joke:

where-am-i-send-help:

ougbad:

karlimeaghan:

A Roman walks into a bar, holds up two fingers, and says ”Five beers, please.”

i dont get it

No one explain it

(via cthulhu-with-a-fez)